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Discussion Starter #1
Found out today my son is graduating from High School 1 year early. He is not ready and I don't think he should. His grades are not the best and he needs a tudor of math. Am I wrong about wanting him to stay for 4 years? Should I let him go on, and hope he goes to college. Any ideas?
 

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has he taken the SATs? has he filled out and been accepted to colleges? if not to these two questions he is only hurting himself by coming out early IMHO
 

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Z28Driver said:
has he taken the SATs? has he filled out and been accepted to colleges? if not to these two questions he is only hurting himself by coming out early IMHO
Agreed.

Have him pick a couple of schools to apply to, and get their minimums for SAT's. If he turns out #'s that get him into the schools he chose, let him go, if not he has to stay.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
pass-variant said:
Z28Driver said:
has he taken the SATs? has he filled out and been accepted to colleges? if not to these two questions he is only hurting himself by coming out early IMHO
Agreed.

Have him pick a couple of schools to apply to, and get their minimums for SAT's. If he turns out #'s that get him into the schools he chose, let him go, if not he has to stay.
Very good advice. I never even thought of that, I have already made some calls. Just one more thing, what if he wants to go to a community collage? There is a local one near where he lives and he doesn't need the SAT's or ACT's to go there.

Could it be I just don't want him or me to grow up? :cry:
 

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Lisa Simpson
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If he needs a math tutor for high school math, how is it that the school is going to let him graduate early???? What is it with these schools that they want to push the kids out when they are not prepared?

Has he considered staying in for honors classes for his senior year? In my high school, the kids who were in the honors track were a year ahead of everyone else and spent their senior year doing classes that weren't required but were extensions of the regular senior year - calculus, nuclear physics, organic synthesis, etc. It was a trip, literally. 8)
 

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Why graduate early from HS? Unless he's a genius and ready to handle the courseload, the social life of college, it's not worth it.

As a college admissions officer last year, I read of quite a few young kids applying to our school who were JUST NOT READY. Suffice to say, most high school seniors ARE NOT READY...but they are coming in together and that adjustment is easier.

He doesn't need to grow up faster. Kids these days are already growing up too fast.

my 2 cents.
 

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I wish I had taken a year to do something between high school and college. This is a great opportunity for him to do something non-academic where he can mature socially, volunteer, work, and maybe even figure out what he wants to be when he grows up. :thumbup:
 

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keep him in high school. especially if his math is not up to par. believe me. i grad'ed class of '02. my math was not at all up to par. my first semester of college, i was tryning to decide what to do, knowing i wanted to be an engineer, but scared of the math. ive struggled through precalculus and calc 1, and im now in calc2, end of my second year in college and i find im doing quite well. however, there isnt a day that goes by that i dont kick myself for not learning the math in HS. it would have made my goal that much more attainable. HTH

¤Daniel
 

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How is graduating a year early with just "ok" grades?

If he really wants to graduate early, I say let him... but don't send him to college just yet. In etrospect I have a much healthier appreciation for college only after graduating from college. I think if I worked a year or two full time before I went to college, I would have done better. I certainly wouldn't have goofed off so much. If I went to school now, I'd SO pay more attention in class.
 

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I got this user title because I'm old and special
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My wife was in the same boat.
She could have graduated early and wanted to. Her mom made her stay on. She didn't do anything except all clubs and easy classes. However, she took classes that make you look good to colleges. Hispanic Club, ASB, Young Business (or whatever it was called). The young buisness club was about debating about buisness and doing buisness stuff. She took top honors and was offered a $200k+ scholarship which she turned down.

She got a job at the school, and she also went to Junior College while attending High School, so she got a taste of college while still attending HS. These units were transferable if she decided to go to 4 year. Your son can do that also.
Finally, he would be missing graduating with all his friends.

Just imagine if my wife would have left, she would have missed all those parties, football games, boyfriends, drunk formal dances, drunken nights, and fights with jealous girls. :shock:

I would make him stay just for the girls because community college sucks in that regards. He will be sorry once HS is gone.
 

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I don't think you have much choice in the matter at this point (with graduation a
few months away). If he has the credits,he will graduate.

Make him work a full time job for a year,he will appreciate school much when he
heads to college.
 

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BoeserBlick said:
I think if I worked a year or two full time before I went to college, I would have done better. I certainly wouldn't have goofed off so much. If I went to school now, I'd SO pay more attention in class.
You said it Bruder! It's one reason I did so much better in Grad school--I worked for several years beforehand.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
I guess I didn't say it above but he is only half way through his sophomore year. He has already taken all classes required for graduation the rest are classes to get enough credits. In his school he needs 30 credits and he has 25 he's only in tenth grade! As far as schools go the schools in my state are the best in the nation in math science and English. But, I agree he should stay however I can see how this could be an excellent opportunity for other things. He is great in track and tied the state record in the 800meter his freshman year (didn't get any recognition as it was the 4x800, bunch of crap) I am going to use track against him. I want him to stay in for that.

Am I living vicariously through my son :???:
 

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If he's great in track, he should stay the year and use that as a way to get into a good school. Colleges are ALWAYS looking for good athletes.

You're not living vicariously through your son, you're looking out for his best interests. At his age, I don't think any of us could say that we knew what we should or needed to do.
 

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I was in the same situation as your son. I was born on Dec. 25th, and my parents could've sent me one year earlier to 1st grade but they decided against it, thinking that it's better to be older then the rest then being the youngest kid in class. Later in life I went back to Israel and came back to the U.S. as a sophomore, I had the opportunity to go into junior class and wanted to, but my mom said that its better that I stay as a sophomore rather then go jump into the junior class. (Also keep in mind that although my English was very poor, my math skills were equivalent to College Calculus 2) During my sophomore year I realized that HS is a serious waste of time for me and that I could do so much more with my time. I never was a fan of school activities, nor did I have much school spirit, so I didn't participate in any clubs. Although I thought about joining the basketball/soccer team that's all it ended up being, a thought. I decided I wanted to skip a year and graduate in 3 years. I had more then enough Math credits, I was the only sophomore in Calc BC and after that one semester I didn't take any more math courses at HS. Instead I took some history, and because I was missing about a year of English so I took courses via mail with some school in Chicago that was accredited for my school. (All this because my mom said that I should go into the sophomore class instead of the junior class.) My point is that my parents, mainly my mom, always told me I shouldn't skip and I seriously think that if I wouldn't have skipped I would've regretted it for the rest of my life. So maybe you should let him be and if he feels like he can do this let him. Also, others people comments about sending him to work before he’s off to college really depend on the type of person he is. Some people understand that money doesn’t grow on trees and value that their parents can pay for their education and don’t goof off while in college. It really depends on who you're dealing with.
 

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PhatRabbitzz said:
During my sophomore year I realized that HS is a serious waste of time for me and that I could do so much more with my time. [snip] It really depends on who you're dealing with.
I whole-heartedly agree. The key goal is placing your son in the position to maximize his chances for success; and the key determinative factor is his personality. If he is mature, perhaps he would fit into the social scene, apply himself in a college setting, and find the appropriate tutoring there. He could really pull himself up by the bootstraps. And, a strong, mature personality in H.S. can feel like he's spending a year in wasted captivity.

But, if he is immature, being placed into a competitive environment that is more difficult than H.S. can work against an insecure psyche. The insecurity coupled with a lack of immediate success can lead to a cycle of failure.

Of course, there are varying options available, including work (full or part time) or attending a community college. Is there a program where he can attend both high school for a 1/2 day (and work on his weaknesses) and some college-level courses in your area (allowing him to stretch)? That way, he can build up his GPA, perhaps partcipate in H.S. extracirriculars, increase his chances of securing a scholarship (or low-interest loan) for college, catch up on his fundamental skills, and have access to the nuturing environment of home. Then, he may get into a better college (than one looking at mediocre grades) and be better prepared educationally and socially. Depends on your son.

I disagree with julianfang's suggestion that at the age of 16 no one knows what they should or need to do. Some kids that age can decide on a course for themselves that results in success. Are they experienced? No. But this doesn't mean that a 16 year old cannot be mature, intelligent, and have excellent decision-making skills.
 

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I'm 23, about to get out of the military. From my experience at that age, and not all will be the same, school was the first thing I wanted to be over. Looking back at it now, I wish I was still in H.S. Does he hate school? What I feel would be best for his future is for him to learn that he is going to be responsible for his actions. His actions after H.S. are going to form the rest of his life. One rule my neighbors back home had for their kid when he dropped out is: If you're not going to school, you're working. Responsibility is the best way to form maturity from my aspect. It is however, hard to force responsibility on your children without them wanting to rebel. This may not be the issue, since every situation will vary by individual basis. HTH
 

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If he can graduate with a degree and enough learning to get into college, let him out. Put him to work for 6 months to buy a good backpack and some travel books and airline tickets. Then send him off to Europe or South America to hike his way into maturity. Appalachian trail might be a good plan if he wants to stay domestic. There's no better time in life to do it. He can eat and drink in any of those countries. It sure gives a person some time to think.

Whatever you do, make sure you challenge him or that he challenges himself. Slacking off for a year is a bad start.

Good luck,

Carl III
 
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